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If Every SEC Team was a Thanksgiving Food

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Let’s all remember what this time of year is all about...assigning Thanksgiving foods to all of the SEC schools.

Immigrant Families Celebrate Thanksgiving In Connecticut Photo by John Moore/Getty Images

University of Alabama: Ham

It’s good. We all know it’s good. It is damn delicious but probably too good for its own good. Too much of it can clog your arteries and give you a heart attack. It has a cult following that likes it even if they’ve never had it.

University of Arkansas: Cheese Plate

It doesn’t really have a spot at the table. It’s normally still in the kitchen right by the sink. It’s unhealthy and no one wants to eat a lot of it. If it’s in front of your face you’ll nibble. But other than that you’ll wait for the main course.

Auburn University: Pumpkin Pie

It does a good job most years. It’s head of the dessert class for sure but it’s never going to be a main entree item even though it tries to be.

LSU: Turkey

It definitely has a prime spot on the table. But it never is really as good as we build it up in our minds. It’s dry and rather tasteless a lot of years. One of the most overrated foods on Thanksgiving Day.

Mississippi State : Sweet Potato Casserole

It’s a classic Thanksgiving food item that has been around since the beginning. To really stand out it has to be different. Maybe add some pecans or marshmallows. Most people enjoy it but it will never get the respect it so desperately craves.

Ole Miss: Cranberry Sauce

It sucks and no one really likes it.

Texas A&M: Mashed Potatoes

When it’s fresh it’s delicious. But as the holiday season progresses toward November it begins to suck. No one likes cold mashed potatoes.

University of Florida: Greens

It’s swampy and well green. It can be decent at times. You can add vinegar or cook them in some type of meat but by themselves they are no good. It’ll probably be a while until anyone really gives them respect that they once had.

University of Georgia: Dressing/Stuffing

It has a prime spot next to the ham and turkey but it is outclassed every year. It’s solid and most people love it but it is never going to be a main course even though it tries so hard.

University of Kentucky: Green Bean Casserole

You want to like it but you can’t. They’re kind of annoying being it’s a vegetable but really a casserole. It’s a decent side dish to some holidays but not all of them. It kind of feels out of place.

Mizzou: Dinner Rolls

It’s boring and dull. If it wasn’t on the table then you’d never miss it.

South Carolina: Corn Bread

You expect it to be a little dry or boring but it can surprise you at times. Under the right leadership it can thrive. Throw some jalapenos and cheddar cheese in the mix and it’s not too bad after all.

University of Tennessee: Corn

It comes in so many variations: cream corn. corn on the cob, corn salsa, plain corn kernels, popcorn, etc. But no matter how you dress it up it will disappoint year after year.

Vanderbilt University: Brussel Sprouts

It’s the smartest thing you could eat being that it’s healthy. But no one really cares about them. Even if you add some garlic, butter, and parmesan they still are bitter. Plus buying brussel sprouts is going to be super expensive.