‘Twas the night before the Egg Bowl, when all through the state
Everybody was stirring, all filled with hate.
The Dawgs were ready to kick some RebelBearShark derriere
To ensure that the Golden Egg will yet again be theirs.
The Dawgs were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Golden Eggs danced in their heads.
With Sharon in her ‘kerchief, and Mike in his hoodie,
Both of them were praying for several touchdowns from Woody.
When outside his home there arose such a clatter,
Mike sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window he flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon lit up the yard, and Mike saw… no!
You’ll never guess what he saw below.
When, what to his wondering eyes should appear,
Ol’ Lane, drinking a beer.
He had no driver, so it must be a trick,
Just the sight of him, made poor Mike sick.
Mike yelled back “I know your coaching stops, the list is filled with names!”,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called out the schools by name!
”First, Oakland! Then Tennessee! Then FAU! Man, Ole Kiffin sticking around is no guarantee.
Gosh, there was USC! And Bama, too! I’m sure there are plenty of other jobs you’ll pursue!
I need my rest, I don’t have the time today! Man, please, just go away!
Now go away! Go away! Go away!”
And then, in a twinkling, he heard on the roof
Mike looked around and then “poof”.
As he drew in his head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney, Will came without making a sound.
He wore Maroon and White, from his head to his foot,
Mike told him to go and rest but he stayed put.
He was used to the pressure, as he carries the whole team on his back,
and he was starting to look like a pro when he drops back.
His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His cheek bones like wood,
Yes, he was nice and groomed just like a good QB should.
He spoke not a word, and went straight to his work,
He yelled at Ole Kiffin, and said “Get out ya jerk!”
As soon as Coach Kiff saw Will, he started to go,
So Will gave a nod, and up the chimney he rose
He went on his way, after he made Lane leave so simple,
The Golden Egg came to mind, so he showed off that dimple.
Mike heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
”Can’t wait for tomorrow Ole Miss, we know we give you a great, big fright!”